“So tense,” he murmured, stroking me.
“Loosen up. Breathe.”
It didn’t occur to me to resist the instructions; my body instinctively obeyed the voice and hands pausing for a moment from their beating to caress and massage my form.
Searing pain lashed my shoulderblade and rippled through my body in a writhing whimper. The option to brace myself internally had been removed. How, I don’t know – only that without it I’m reduced to this state of responsive helplessness.
My entire body arched backwards as sound wrenched from my throat.
If only he wouldn’t keep hitting that same damn spot.
My world is each moment. Nothing exists beyond the physical space I occupy. Between the blindfold and the rope securing my wrists above my head any thought of escape or fighting back has long since vanished. There’s only this. Here. Now.
“Please stop.” The words escaped my lips unbidden.
He paused. “Did you just beg me to stop?”
I shook my head vehemently, defiance welling up. I may not have much dignity left but I’ll white knuckle whatever vestiges remain.
“No? I thought I heard you begging me to stop.”
His amusement was palpable. Ugh.
I maintained silence.
“Shhh… I think I hear someone coming.” Hands wrapped around my throat in a choke hold and began to squeeze.
There are certain disadvantages to playing in a public park, even off trail and out of sight amongst the forest’s thick underbrush.
“Do you trust me to give you air when you need it?”
I nodded without hesitation.
My airways were cut off. I panicked. In sheer desperation my foot pathetically clawed at his shin. His voice dropped to a near whisper in my ear as he continued, releasing enough for me to breathe before tightening his grip again. I hung on every word, every touch, as helplessly as I hung from the rope above me.
I don’t know if I’ve ever been more free.
Grip released, I whimpered.
“Are you okay?”
“Yes or no?”
I forced my brain to focus for a moment. Gut check. “Yes.”
“Your hands okay? Can you feel this? Squeeze my fingers. Good.”
Untold minutes later I feel myself untied and gently carried to a spot where we can sit down. Slowly, I begin to come out of the dreamy haze, amidst details that now escape my memory. As my strength began returning, so did my personality…
“Yeah, you’d better give me a hug after what you just did to me.”